From: glen mccready 
  To: 0xdeadbeef@substance.abuse.blackdown.org
  Cc: tracy@qnx.com, tanya@qnx.com, wils0123@algonquinc.on.ca
Date: Wed, 15 Oct 1997 10:28:19 -0400

Forwarded-by: anonymous

It was time for Father John's Saturday night bath and young Sister
Magdalene Edwards had prepared the bath water and towels just the
way the old nun had instructed.  Sister Magdalene Edwards was also
instructed not to look at Fr. John's nakedness if she could help
it, do whatever he told her to do, and pray.

The next morning the old nun asked Sister Magdalene how the
Saturday night bath had gone.  "Oh, sister," said the young nun
dreamily.  "I've been saved."

"Saved?  And how did that fine thing come about?"  asked the old
nun.

"Well, when Fr. John was soaking in the tub, he asked me to wash
him, and while I was washing him he guided my hand down between
his legs where he said the Lord keeps the Key to Heaven."

"Did he now," said the old nun evenly.

Sister Magdalene continued, "And Fr. John said that if the Key to
Heaven fit my lock, the portals of Heaven would be opened to me
and I would be assured of salvation and eternal peace.
And then Father John guided his Key to Heaven, into my lock".

"Is that a fact," said the old nun even more evenly.

"At first it hurt terribly, but Fr. John said the pathway to
salvation was often painful and that the glory of God would soon
swell my heart with ecstasy.  And it did, it felt so good being
saved."

"That wicked old Devil," said the old nun.  "He told me it was
Gabriel's Horn, and I've been blowing it for 40 years!